One-liners

[TonyCarter]

I get my 10k steps in every day.

Don't know what the 'k' stands for though

 

[Martinr36]

I get my 10k steps in every day.

Don't know what the 'k' stands for though

Isn't it something like kick

 

[TonyCarter]

Isn't it something like kick

Could be...but that sounds a bit too energetic. Can't get my legs behind my head or do the splits anymore either

 

[Martinr36]

Could be...but that sounds a bit too energetic. Can't get my legs behind my head or do the splits anymore either

You mean there was a time when you could............

 

[ubuysa]

I too have a pair of big fur-lines boot-like slippers, but that's because the tiled floors here can be chilly underfoot in winter and because I rarely wear socks - except when it's really REALLY cold, which is around 5°C here.... 🤭

We do a lot of swimming to stay flexible, except when it's stormy of course, which it often is in the winter. It's perfect swimming here in the winter - no tourists! This was the beach closes to us the other day....

 

[SpyderTracks]

I too have a pair of big fur-lines boot-like slippers, but that's because the tiled floors here can be chilly underfoot in winter and because I rarely wear socks - except when it's really REALLY cold, which is around 5°C here.... 🤭

We do a lot of swimming to stay flexible, except when it's stormy of course, which it often is in the winter. It's perfect swimming here in the winter - no tourists! This was the beach closes to us the other day....

View attachment 40422

Pure heaven! I can just imagine sat on a beach side cafe with a coffee watching the world go by.

 

[TonyCarter]

You mean there was a time when you could............

Of course...I used to do gymnastics at primary school. My mother got fed up of me doing flips and cartwheels in the supermarket aisle.

I tried to do a cartwheel last year and nearly dislocated my shoulder!

 

[SpyderTracks]

Of course...I used to do gymnastics at primary school. My mother got fed up of me doing flips and cartwheels in the supermarket aisle.

I tried to do a cartwheel last year and nearly dislocated my shoulder!

I can’t spell cartinternalhernia

 

[TonyCarter]

Well, only dislocated it once and that was during a javelin competition.

Have fractured my hip skiing though.

That's about it for my history of sporting injuries (ignoring lots of ankle/wrist sprains).

 

[SpyderTracks]

Well, only dislocated it once and that was during a javelin competition.

Have fractured my hip skiing though.

That's about it for my history of sporting injuries (ignoring lots of ankle/wrist sprains).

I hurt my pride on a number of occasions.

 

[TonyCarter]

I hurt my pride on a number of occasions.

It's easier if you don't have any pride to begin with

 

[ubuysa]

Pure heaven! I can just imagine sat on a beach side cafe with a coffee watching the world go by.

Ah.... The beachside cafes close in the winter. They're more for tourists, locals won't pay the inflated prices just for looking at the sea. There are plenty of other cafes where you can watch the world go by. We were in one earlier today.....

 

[Martinr36]

Well, only dislocated it once and that was during a javelin competition.

Have fractured my hip skiing though.

That's about it for my history of sporting injuries (ignoring lots of ankle/wrist sprains).

I've broken bones twice in my life;

The first he I broke my leg tib and fib, that was due to me hitting a parked car so not my fault, caused by the person who parked the car and the young lady wearing a short skirt walking down the other side of the road.
The second time I broke my hip coming off a push bike, caused by a bad kerb stone

 

[ubuysa]

I've broken bones twice in my life;

The first he I broke my leg tib and fib, that was due to me hitting a parked car so not my fault, caused by the person who parked the car and the young lady wearing a short skirt walking down the other side of the road.
The second time I broke my hip coming off a push bike, caused by a bad kerb stone

Where was the young lady with a short skirt that second time?

 

[HomerJ]

Just be arrested on a plane after seeing an old friend flying to the same destination

Apparently security do not like when you shout across the plane

"Hi Jack"

 

[Martinr36]

Where was the young lady with a short skirt that second time?

That was the defective kerb settings fault

 

[Tron1982]

 

[HomerJ]

 

[SpyderTracks]

 

[HomerJ]